Love Advice About Past Relationship Experiences

1. People who have experienced love will be lonelier than those who have not.
   Being in love has many benefits. People who have never been in love are ignorant of the benefits and usually have learned to fulfill their needs alone. This will make them more independent and lowering their need for a lover.
   
   
2. People who have been in love will devote more energy to be in love again.
   Once people have fallen in love, they are aware of the benefits of love. It's a lot easier to have a lover fulfill your needs, than learning to fulfill your own needs.
   
   
3. People from good families would value marriage more than people from dysfunctional ones.
   If your family life has brought you a lot of happiness during your childhood, as an adult you will want to duplicate a family that is at least as good as the one you came from. If your family was dysfunction, where your parents caused each other a lot of misery, you will value marriage less, because you are more aware of the huge cost of a bad marriage.
   
   
4. People in past abusive relationships may have problems falling in love.
   If past lovers have hurt you, you may be hesitant to find another lover. However, people in past abusive relationship have other issues and may need to be in a relationship to fulfill other needs making them a victim of codependency.
   
   
5. Pursuing people who have little or no baggage is easier than pursuing those who have some.
   People, who never been hurt before, usually have no inhibition to give their full love. People, who have been hurt, may be cautious to make themselves vulnerable to another lover. This is why most people consider their "first love" very special, when they were innocent and both people loved completely. Once people have baggage, they force their future lovers to deal with the baggage, increasing their lovers' emotional cost.
   
   
6. Pursuing people who are always in a relationship is easier than pursuing loners.
   Loners usually are independent and their need for a lover is usually less. Also, most loners may be socially inept and unable to relate to people. Another reason is that loners may already be in love with themselves or their career causing them to be emotional unavailable for another love. Finally, there may be reasons why people do not want to be friends with a loner. Befriending them may provide no benefits or your love cost may be too high.
   
   

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Love Advice Knowledgebase

• The Core Variables of Love
  • Love Advice About Emotional Availability
  • Love Advice About Past Relationship Experiences
  • Love Advice About Commitment
• The Benefits of Love
  • Emotional Needs
    • Love Advice About Esteem Needs
    • Love Advice About Social Needs
    • Love Advice About Spiritual Needs
    • Safety Needs
      • Love Advice About Stress Levels and Tolerance
      • Love Advice About Support Network
  • Love Advice About Entertainment Needs
  • Materialistic Needs
    • Love Advice About Primary Needs
    • Love Advice About Sexual Needs
    • Love Advice About Materialistic Desires
• The Costs of Love
  • Maintenence Cost
    • Love Advice About Emotional Cost
    • Love Advice About Time Cost
    • Love Advice About Financial Cost
    • Love Advice About Opportunity Cost